Live for today, not six months from yesterday

I am in denial. Denial that I am nineteen, denial that I have to think about my future career, denial that it's finals week next week, denial that I'm no longer a "straight A" student (it hurts my heart to say it. But college is tough, kids. Especially when you spread yourself exceedingly thin and keep getting injured...) I'm even in denial that Christmas is in 12 days, I can eat Reese's Pieces in 13 days, and 2014 starts in 18 days. Denial denial DENIAL. Olympics start in February, I'm going to Italy in July, then I'll be a Junior in college next fall?! Craaaaaaaazyyyyy.

I hate thinking about the future, but today I humored myself (and stressed myself out) by pondering on the future while I was driving home from school. And I realized: I could take my life in so many directions. There are so many dreams and aspirations that I have. So many scary but exciting chances I could take.

For example, don't make fun of me, but I deeply want to become a Radio City Rockette. Like, REALLY badly. Or join some ballet company (PNB? eh, maybe not, but it's a dream...) or a jazz company (like Odyssey or something...) that will appreciate the crazy flexibility in my back (haha.), or I could become a personal secretary. Or I could marry a football player and become such a cute little wifey while we travel from game to game, and I would keep up on all the stats of the best players and the best teams and maybe finally understand the NFL and football in general. Or stay in Utah Valley and teach at some small studio, get married and live a typical life. I have so many scenarios in my head of how my future should turn out, but none of them agree with each other. Thus the confusion and stress.

I don't want to live an ordinary life.

Ok fine. Just read the next part even though you're probably rolling your eyes right now. These are my unmasked emotions, and I don't let them out very often. So be happy and read on :)

I want to marry someone that I will always feel young with. That way we can listen to our favorite bands and artists all the time, even if my favorite happens to be the Jonas Brothers #noshame. We'll feel just as young at 30 as we did at 20. That type. I want someone who is funnier than I am, crazier than I am, and can make uglier facial expressions than me. We need to never get bored of each other and never run out of things to say to each other. And...
...that's the furthest you'll get into my brain for now.

Happy Finals week, everyone. Try not to OD on caffeine and get at least some sleep because it's the best thing for your brain. Besides vegetables. I'll give updates of my life after next week is over, I promise.

Until then,

Lize.

~Just Remember~

Happiness is a risk

Beauty is subjective

Love is sacrifice

Kind words are enabling

Confidence is key

Orion is a constellation

but Idaho is 2.5 hours away.

Christmas is coming.

Tidbits: 2nd installment

You can cry and be sad today, but tomorrow it is someone else's turn.

You are only allowed to be frustrated or angry about something for 60 seconds. Within that 60 seconds you can scream, grumble, yell, clench your fists, whatever the hey you want, but as soon as the time is up, you must move on and let the past go.  (It really works.)

Paper chains make for really cute bedroom decor, just sayin. (currently trying to revamp my room some more. It's a long process, but I'll show you a picture when it's done...if it ever gets done...)

It's ok to be a One-Directioner. #noshame

Lists are great. Keep multiple lists of all the random things in your life. Favorite movie lists, to-do lists, dessert lists, things to tell a missionary about lists, dreams and aspirations lists, future husband lists, etc.

Smoothies (fresh fruit and some green stuff too) are a refreshing way to start the day.

Text or call someone special, just because.

Snuggle with small babies any chance you get.

Super cliché, but the best discovery I've made thus far in my life: as far as making friends goes, reveal your true self right away. Chances are people are going to like you better for who you are than for who you are pretending to be. Plus, if you took my advice from the previous post and have some great facial expressions, the crowd will be sold on loving you... (hopefully. But that sounded a little conceited. Bottom line: Beee yourself.)

Singing Disney songs at the top of your lungs is always necessary.

Be sassy. Everyone likes a girl/boy with a little sass.

To all the humbugs of the world- Christmas music IS acceptable whenever we want it to be. So there.

Don't look down while walking around on BYU campus. Chances are you'll run into a couple who has stopped walking and are now kissing. (but you didn't see them stop because you were looking down) #awkward

Write funny things as well as dramatic things in your journal, so someday in the future you can make fun of how stupid/funny/ridiculous/immature/dramatic you were.

To be continued...

My Tidbits: 1st installment

Never flush public bathroom toilets with your hands.

Sing. Even if you're terrible. Just sing out.

Have the courage to yell, "Happy Wednesday!" out the car window at a stranger.

Procrastination isn't always a bad thing. But it is almost never a good thing. Think about it.

Spice up your facial expressions. They make conversations so much more interesting.

Go for the gold. This does NOT mean marry for money. This means try your best in everything you do and don't sweat the small stuff. Do you think Kristi Yamaguchi or Michelle Kwan sweated the small stuff? Nope. And that's why they have gold medals.

Choreograph a "Yay, it fits perfectly!" dressing room dance for when you try on clothes at a store. You'll never regret it.

Eat Chocolate and don't count the calories. You'll be a lot happier if you love yourself for who you are.

Hold the ones you love a little closer.

Don't wish away time because you don't know how much time you have left.

Pray for everyone by name.

Do a crazy dance for yourself, and then do another one for those who may not be able to dance right now.

Find reasons to smile and laugh, even if it's at your own stupidity.

Have a crush on someone. There is nothing that even compares to the goofy, giddy, out-of-the-blue-smiling-like-an-idiot feelings that come with having a crush. Even if there is no chance it would ever work out. (Some might say you're just torturing yourself, but why not make yourself a little happy for once?)

When applying eyelash glue, less is way way better.

Rock your own skin. There is nothing greater than seeing someone who is confident and comfortable with who they are.

Strut. Just do it.

Free Fallin'

Maybe there's something to say about the free fallers. Who give their whole hearts to something before they even know for sure if it's going to work out.

The risk-takers

The diligent

The resilient

The generous.

Even the "swindlers".

On another note:
There is definitely something to say about my two favorite ladies in the entire world. Telley and Clarissa. I have mentioned them before. They are my heroes. My best friends. They got me through some of the hardest times in my life, and I learned so much from dancing with both of them. There is something special gained from a friendship made through dance. It's hard to describe, but it is NOT anything like a normal friendship one might acquire elsewhere. The only way I can think to describe it is that they see you at your lowest points of life--when your self-esteem couldn't be any worse-- and they also see you at the times when you are on top of the world and celebrating your progress and success.
Point being, they are both engaged, and I cried of happiness when I found out (on both accounts). I also let out some girlish squeals and kicked my feet in the air (as any red-blooded female would...)
I love weddings. I want to be a wedding planner, so if any of you, my readers, need help planning a wedding, hit me up!! I collect bridal guides and often spend my time researching the latest wedding trends. Definitely a passion. Haha. The day I get a pinterest will be some day. My planning capacity will explode.

Also, speaking of craftiness, 

Click Here.

Are they not the cutest things you have ever seen??? I am totally going to buy some for my future little girls or nieces or something because they are absolutely adorable. And cheap too! I love them. They are designed by one of my old dance teachers. She makes adult sized ones too! (hint, hint, Mother. Christmas is coming, is it not?)

Happy Friday, fiends.

xoxo,

 Lize.

No one celebrates

What are seasons anyway?

"December, you've always been a problem child. December, you run me downright restless and wild, and I remember when you used to be mine..."

Fifty-four days until I'm done with this semester, sixty until I can eat Reese's Pieces, and two hundred seventeen days until my birthday.  

I'm good at counting down, if you were curious.

P.S. Look up Sara Bareilles' new album called "The Blessed Unrest" because it is simply genius. Also, Tori Kelly's song called "Dear No One" is my jam today.

P.P.S. I am getting a little carried away with the pictures, huh. Sincerest apologies.

A Heart Full of Love

Ok, ok. The title of this post is from Les Mis. But that's because I saw the 2012 version of the movie for the very first time this evening (que the statements such as, "what, do you live under a stupid rock or something?" And the answer is yes, yes I do), and this song melted my heart (I also love the Nick Jonas version of this song, so haters back off). Anyhooter, here's a post, not cryptic in any way [you're welcome, Clarissa :) ], in regards to all the people I've been thinking about lately.

Telley and Clarissa, my bestest buds from WBC. Without them my life would have fallen to pieces. Exploded into smithereens. I can't even express my love and excitement for both of them, and I can't wait for our current lunch tradition to turn into weekend getaways in St. George. Clarissa, I cried on the way home from lunch. I'm so so happy for you, but I'm going to miss you SO much. Also, I may or may not have gone Wedding gift shopping for you already because I'm so excited. Telley, you may never read this, but you have made the biggest impact on my life and taught me what it means to love dance and to fight for the things I love. Thank you for weekly warmup therapy sessions and for all your advice. I'll never be able to thank you enough. I love you both!!

Aubrie. Although I've never met her, I already love Denzlie with all my heart. She is adorable, and I can't wait to meet her. Thank you so much for being a constant support to me for the past three years of my life. You are an inspiration.

Mother. Duh everyone loves their moms, but the relationship my mother and I have is so special. She is my hero. She also keeps me alive and puts such an effort into modifying meals so I can eat them. I love you, Mother. You really are my best bud. Thank you for letting me cry to you.

Shannon. I miss you so so much every day. I think of a million things every day that I can't wait to text you, but I have cried many times when I remember that you're actually in Georgia. I especially want to quote this with you: "when she found the necklace... Right now... She was so... So happy." I love you, sis. 

Father. Thank you for being a worthy priesthood holder. The blessing you gave me for school this year is my motivation when things get really tough. And lately, things have been really tough. Thank you, also, for loving me all the time and for your million dollar hugs. I love you!

Benjamin: thank you for your phonecalls. You always call right when my spirits need to be uplifted. Thank you, also, for your voicemails. I look forward to them the most.

KP. Where in the world are you? You look simply stunning and so happy, and I hope you are well beyond measure :) I love you, Fiendy!

To MaryBeth and the members of the Pack & Ship (Destinee, Brooklyn, etc. ) thank you for making me laugh and keeping a smile on my face when it was the last thing on my agenda. You guys are the BEST.

Morgan, you're always there right when I need you. I miss our word vomit nights that usually involve Costa or Café and/or froyo. Thank you, and I miss you.

Marley-I miss you!! We need to skype or facetime or something soon to catch up. I hope life is running smoothly for you, you stunning girl.

Addy, I miss you a lot and wonder what such a brilliant mind as yourself is up to on a daily basis. Your talents and abilities {and instagram and blog posts} absolutely amaze me, and I hope you are doing well. I love you, bb!

COOOOOODYYYYYY. It sort of kind of almost feels like you died. I wrote you an email, but you never replied, and I was so so so incredibly sad. I miss you, but I'm so happy you are in Washington serving your little heart out.

Chandi. I have not seen you in too long, and I seriously think about you and miss you every day. I hope you are loving Cali. When do you come home?? I need someone to talk to about you-know-what and you-know-who. Also, I'm being Hermione for Halloween, and I wish you were going to be here to see it.

Connor. Con. Conster. James Dean. Mah main squeeze. You taught me how to trust and be a faithful and reliable friend. Also, you taught me how to genuinely care about people. I miss your steamboat-y laugh and when you cover your mouth when you laugh really hard. Thank you for writing me a song and for working at Five Guys and for insisting upon watching Amanda Bynes with me because we are still faithful fans despite her recent meltdowns... Thank you, also, for going on a mission. The people of Montana are being changed every day by your uplifting messages. Keep up the great work!


I love lots of people for lots of different reasons. 

Love is something that everyone 

wants 

and needs 

and seeks 

and {eventually} finds.

Too often run-on sentences

Those days when you set your alarm for extra early to get some studying in before getting ready for the day, but you subconsciously turn off the alarm and continue sleeping.

Those days when you wake up late, realizing that you are supposed to be at a training meeting at work in Provo in twenty minutes and you live at least 30 minutes away.

Those days when you were going to bring milk to the training meeting, so everyone can have cereal and milk, but since you were late you totally spaced the milk until you walk in empty handed and apparently no one else thought to bring milk.

When your language is broken from Moment Number One of your consciousness this morning.

Those days when instead of going to your class you sit in the break room at work and eat cereal and talk about your body's soreness and times you almost ran over animals in the streets.

Or the ones where you have only eaten sugar the entire day, and you feel like crap.

How about the ones where you have a ballet midterm and you do less than satisfactory because all you have eaten is sugar, and you're sore and have noooooo energy.

Definitely the ones when you sweat more than anyone you know (welcome to the life of this dancer. TMI? Not even sorry. sorry.)

The ones when your shin splints were healed for one day, but today was not that day. 

Then when you come back to work and only eat more sugar. #fatkid

Also the days when you're super tired on the way home and run over the curb in your not-so-tank of a car (Don't worry. Watson did not receive any damage because she aspires to be a tank.)

Or the days when you lock your keys in the car, and that key is the only key your family has for Watson.

Like the ones where your next door neighbor uses a hanger and breaks into your car to get the key (thanks, Brother McArthur. You saved me.)

When you can't tell if you feel like every muscle in your body is pulled or just sore

The days that end in completely glazed-eyes and inability to focus on studying for anymore midterms tonight.

When you miss what life used to be like before things got complicated. Why are things always getting complicated?

Trying to keep my head up. The harder I try to keep it up, the harder it is to hold up.
But for now, it is up.

This post is about words and phrases that I love and wish people would use more in every day conversation:

thwarted
juggernaut
fiend
reverie
ratchet
"I was left to my own devices"
thus
"yea verily"
frump
frumpy
reesty
therefore
"thank you, good night"
via
lurpy
"riddle me this"
Kabosh (definition still unknown.)
Vile
peasant

shank
Methinks

"Hot mess"

"...With every fiber of my being"

Srsly.

Thensome

Inquisitive

Evasive

Cusp

Brink

Snarf

Coerce

Heinous

"If you will"

And many, many others. 

What are some of your favorite words?

P.s. Is it just me or does the house become 30 trillion times creepier when you're home alone?

When I...

...think of Montana, I think of

(Zoe!)

Happy 1 year mark, Con!

(359 Days)