The F{r}iend

We all know and absolutely adore him.

I can't even tell you what kind of stuff this kid has been there for me through. The fact that he's off saving the world, one Nebraskan convert at a time, makes me so happy, but I miss him so much. And it has only been two days!

He's the type of person who you may not hang out with every day, but when he's gone, you physically feel a void in your life. He can almost out quote me when it comes to Harry Potter, and his movie selections are always golden. Even when we watched Cloverfield. (You realize I NEVER could have watched that with anyone else, don't you?) There are so many layers to this kid, but he is generous to all in showing his true self. My favorite thing about him: He is bold as lions. He doesn't sugar coat things. He just tells it like it is, and it doesn't even sound that harsh. He is very welcoming and friendly, even when he doesn't get along with the people. He can make almost everyone feel comfortable and wanted, even if that isn't necessarily the case... haha. 

I could list all the things I love about him, but that would take WAY too long. I could also share funny stories, but most of them wouldn't be funny to you. So instead, enjoy these pictures and a lil snippet of his lovely voice that I won't get to hear for two whole years. (I'm still kicking myself for not thinking to record the whole song on my phone, so the clip is from Morgan...)

It's a little crazy to think that I probably wouldn't have met him if he hadn't done theater...

^My Favorite Pic of the Entire World^

All growed up! Can you believe it, Benjamin?

Thanks for all the precious memories. You really are the best.

P.S. Here is a tiny lil taste of what I heard every car ride, lunch time, after school, ice cream run or movie night, practically every day of our friendship. 

She's at Home... Baking.

Eating is my very favorite thing. If I could eat all day every day without becoming morbidly obese, I would. I just love food. I could marry food if it was a real thing.

My weakness? Desserts. 100%. I have the HARDEST TIME turning down desserts and often times I just don't even try to fight it. So there's that.

So tonight I made these:

These cookies are... ok well they haven't come out of the oven yet, but when they do, I'll let you know!! The dough is good, so that's pretty promising.

Here's the recipe. And, if you're interested, you should check out this blog for other healthy recipes.

Chocolate Brownie Cookies

• 1/2 cup spelt flour (or ww pastry or white flour. You can use Arrowhead Mills’ gf mix if you add a little extra liquid so the dough is less crumbly.) (70g)
• 1/4 cup cocoa powder (20g)
• 1/4 tsp baking powder
• 1/4 tsp salt (just under level)
• 1/4 plus 1/8 tsp baking soda
• 1/4 cup xylitol or sugar (45g)
• 1 NuNaturals stevia packet, or 1 tbsp extra sugar
• 1 tsp pure vanilla extract
• 5 tbsp vegetable or coconut oil (50g)
• If needed: 1 tbsp milk of choice or more oil (15g)
• 1/3 to 1/2 cup mini chocolate chips (50-65g) (Technically, you can omit… but the recipe is so much better if you don’t! Mini chips are ideal; if you must use regular-sized, I recommend chopping them up to be smaller so you get chocolate in every bite.)
• optional: a few drops of pure almond extract, for a fun flavor variation

In a mixing bowl, combine all dry ingredients and stir very well. In a separate bowl, mix all liquid ingredients. Now pour wet into dry, stir to combine fully, transfer the dough to a big plastic bag, and smush into one big ball while still inside the bag. Remove from bag and make mini balls, place on a greased cookie sheet, then fridge at least 30 minutes, or freeze 15 minutes. (If you want crispy healthy cookies, you can skip this step and bake immediately.) Preheat oven to 325 F, then bake 10 minutes. They will look underdone when they come out, but that is ok. Just be sure to let them cool at least another 10 minutes before trying to pick the cookies up. (If you want flatter cookies than the ones in the photos, you can flatten them before or after they go in the oven.) Makes 14-17 cookies. For soft cookies, store in a lidded plastic container; for crispy cookies, store in a glass container.

P.S. The cookies are yummy. Really rich, but super good.

In Dreams You Will Lose Your Heartaches

I realized lately that if you want to make something of yourself, you actually have to chase your dreams and be willing to do absolutely anything to reach your goal. You're thinking, "Duhhhh," but for some reason, I thought somehow my dreams would just magically happen to me and one day I would wake up and be whatever I had dreamed of becoming. After waking up and realizing that wouldn't actually happen in real life, I went through a phase of mediocrity, where I was willing to live an ordinary life, go to college, get a job that had nothing to do with my major, and never leave Utah Valley because why try anyway, right? Go through the motions. It's who you are and always will be. Just a face in the crowd. But I wasn't happy. Then, I'm not exactly sure how or when, but something changed.

I became more confident in myself and the potential I hold. I realized that I was not made for a mediocre life. I have gifts that I can share with the world, if I'm willing to work a little harder to get to a place where I want to be.
I am terrified. Who am I to audition to be a Radio City Rockette? Who am I to think that I could have a professional career in dance in California or Chicago or New York? Or on another spectrum of my life, who am I to even think about becoming a personal secretary and organizing some famous person's daily life?
Simply sticking around and getting "regular job" after college is not enough for me. The whole get married and have kids and live in the suburbs forever is great for a lot of people, and it may be in my future at some point, but not right now, and not as far as I know within the next few years. And I may not be good enough for the Rockettes, and I may not make it into the professional companies I'm looking into across the country, but I will never know if I was good enough or not until I try, right?

So. You really do have to be willing to take a step into the dark or off the cliff of comfort or where ever you imagine yourself right now. It's terrifying and very thrilling at the same time. Don't let the stress of it become debilitating, but let it be motivating. Let it be the wind that pushes you further and further down the path you want to be on until you reach your Emerald City or Fountain of Youth or Happily Ever After. 

You have to GO FOR IT.

You've Got the Wrong Girl!

I've definitely tweeted about it a few times... But I read through them all again and died laughing.

I am CONSTANTLY being texted and called by people who have the wrong number. I feel so awkward when I have to tell them that I'm not who they think I am, but keeping the texts is my favorite part. So here are some of the texts for your personal enjoyment:

"Can we bring Weensie? I don't want her to be by herself." 
(I'm praying that's the name of their dog or something...)

Her: "Merry Christmas!"
Me: "Thanks! Happy Christmas to you too. Sorry, but I don't know who this is?"
Her: "Shelley"
(I don't know a Shelley....)

Person #1: "Thanks again! Everything fit perfect!"
Person #2: "Yeah thank you!"
(I have no idea who these people are, and I didn't give clothing or anything that would "fit" to anyone for Christmas...)

"Hi Nashayla is taking orders for girlscout cookies. Would you like to order?"
Me: "Sorry, who is this?"
"Charleen"
(I don't know a Charleen...)

"Just wanted to wish you a happy birthday. One day I would like to talk to you. Have a good day" 
(Not only is that text more than slightly creepy, but it was sent to me on Feb. 22. Definitely not my birthday.)

So random, and so hysterical. Anyway, I hope you're all living your lives, and reaching for the stars. Tomorrow I'm gonna talk about dreams and how mine are terrifying me right now. Which is a good thing, right? We'll see.

xoxo,
Lize.

I Am the Luckiest Girl

Looking at plane tickets really makes things hit home...

I'M ACTUALLY GOING TO ITALY!!!!!!

Sure the airfare alone costs more than any possessions I have, but I just got so excited because it is going to be downright terrifying and a blast all in one! The kind of excitement where you feel like your stomach is in your throat and you want to throw up? Yep, that's what I'm feeling right now.
Especially because we aren't all traveling there together. So a great big YIKES if something happens to me on the way there...or on the way back. But let's not think about that.

Italy. It is calling my name. I have no idea what to expect because I've never been out of the country, so I am so stoked to be completely shell-shocked by the new culture and lifestyle.

I CAN PRACTICALLY SMELL THE OCEAN BREEZE!!!!

It just got real, folks. 

Now the question is,

How do I pack for 6 weeks in one suitcase?
Suggestions obviously accepted, but nobody is really into that sort of thing, I guess, so I guess you don't really have to comment. But I would love it if you did...

xoxo,
Lize

"We have an 8-swan pileup in the foyer..."

White feathers, pointe shoe ribbons, sequins and hairspray and lipstick. "Places Please!", fruit snacks and junk food, bobby pins, flirting with guys at the booth to get them to buy tickets, nieces dressed in princess dresses, children who want my picture and autograph, surprise roses from Brock, fake eyelashes and "Prince and Princess Parties".

All factors of the most exhausting and rewarding week of my life. 

Sorry I've been MIA the past little while. (as if anyone would care...) I seriously felt like my life was spiraling out of control, and I still don't quite have a handle on it. It scares me a bit, to be out of control. Then there's the whole part where my body rebelled and literally refuses to be ok anymore. But exhaustion to the point of tears is normal, I guess.

Summer Lee Rhatigan is the most amazing ballet teacher I've ever had. Even if it was only for three days. She has the biggest, fullest perspective of all things good and makes you want to dance and to feel and look pretty when you dance. Her classes are hard, but they feel so good. Which is what I have been needing. And she is hysterical, so double brownie points for her.

Brooklyn (my co-pack 'n' ship-worker) and I have started obsessing over Theo James, so you can add him to the list of delicious men to look at. (I am so superficial, it's insane.)

Also, I miss my Sadie dog. She was the best.

What do you people want to hear about my life? I'm literally at a loss of words. Life is one big out of body experience for me right now. 

Heartthrobs and hoaxes

Remember how I said I was going to get rid of my blog? I lied. I'm too partial to it... And even if Benjamin is the only one who reads it, so be it! (Thanks, Benjamin. You're the best.)

Warning- This is about to get REAL girly, real fast. Bring on the estrogen.

Today is called: Confession Time

I have a serious confession. About a serious obsession. 

His name is Zachary David Alexander Efron. 

Ok. Listen. I know you're laughing and tears are probably streaming down your face because it's so silly of me to say it's serious, but it really is.

I've passed the fangirl-ing stage. If I could marry him, I would. In a heart beat. I have had multiple dreams about him (I HATED myself for waking up each time), and every time I hear his voice come on my ipod or tv screen, I MELT and forget my own name. He's a hunk. A heartthrob. I could stare at him for hours, and sometimes I do. (I mean, I look him up on pinterest and scroll through all the pictures.) It's not healthy, you guys. When the girls at work start chatting about boyfriends and cute guys they met on campus, I bring up Zac. And they just let it happen. Sometimes they even join in the admiration. Although I still wish he was with Vanessa, I'm glad he's dating Lily Collins!!! At least he was back in October, so who even knows if they're still together. Regardless, she is STUNNING, and sometimes I obsess over her, too.

Morgan knows the extent of the damage, and I'm pretty sure it's not curable.

Next heartthrobs. 
[I can't number them because then I feel like I'm betraying the others... :) ]

Zachary Levi. (I honestly don't know what it is with the name Zachary...)
I was smitten when he was in the TV series called Chuck, and then every hope of recovering was lost when I found out he could sing in Tangled. His teeth are perfect, he's hysterical, and he looks so rugged. Yes please. Also, he's 6' 3 1/4'' (trust me, I know how important the 1/4 is...), so I could wear heels next to him and still feel short. Okkkkkk so maybe he's 14 years older than me. Just go with it. 

I'm laughing at the whole idea of me actually posting this right now.

Ryan Reynolds. I know he's married, but ladies and gentlemen, I swoon over Ryan Reynolds. He's too good to be true. And I actually couldn't be more pleased that he is married to the most perfect woman (in my opinion), Blake Lively. I die over them.

Blake Jenner. Wow. He is gorgeous. And His voice is melty and so nice. Not to mention how he's like my ideal man (second to Zac, of course). He's so muscly too!! I can totally picture myself with someone like him. Too bad he's engaged too. To Melissa Benoist. (Sometimes) I wish I was her.

Josh Duhamel.Stop stop stop stop stop. It's too much. I can't even say anything about him. STUPIDHOT, if you will.

So now you know my current celeb crushes/obsessions.

Seriously Zac Efron though. Even if I start thinking about him, I die a thousand deaths. I'm so girly and naïve, but I am what I am, so take it or leave it.

Who are your celebrity crushes (or obssessions)?

(Drop Dead) Beautiful

Have you ever flat out hated yourself? You know those days when nothing is going right, and just as things start to come together they fall apart again? Or how you'll never be good enough for recognition from guest dance teachers because to them you're considered over-weight? Do you ever think, "what is wrong with me?" Or compare yourself to others who are better, stronger, smarter, faster, prettier, or wittier than you? Raise your hands if, at one point in your life, you had a pity party for yourself.

I sure as heck have. But it's days like these when we can just eat a little more chocolate (even if it isn't helping the whole "weight" situation, who cares?...) and live vicariously through other people's cute love lives.

When days like these happen, channel that hatred or negative vibes away from the Fiestasaurus Rex. Put your sassy pants on and strut across campus or down the hall at school or work or even at the grocery store. Jam out to a diva-licious song and get your groove on. Because 

you are you and that's the best you can do. :)

[Ultimately you should love yourself, so after you get your confident self back, try to think positively. Think of how good your life is and the opportunities and possibilities you have at your finger tips.]

You're drop dead beautiful.


P.s. Ladies, if you're looking for a fun fashion and makeup blog, follow this lady : click here

A New Year

I'm thinking about retiring the ole blog. A new year, a new me, you know? At least that's what everyone says. I want to make something of this year. Something worth remembering. Nothing good ever really came of this place anyway... soooo. Stay tuned to see I guess.

In the meanwhile, enjoy my favorite song for each new year, sung by my dear friends, the glee club:

This is a new year

***This was supposed to be posted on January 1st***

I love New Years Eve. and day. But for as long as I can remember, I've never actually attended a party with friends or strangers. Most years I've watched the ball drop on tv by myself. And it's not that bad. Refreshing, actually. I make a pact with myself every year at midnight about how the next year is going to go.

Here is what is in store for this year:

-I'm going to be more open with people. I'm very... careful, if you will. I struggle with trusting others with information about me, so I'm cautious about who I let in. I keep to myself unless absolutely necessary, which isn't the best state to be in. I reached a lot of "breaking point"s in 2013 because I wouldn't let anyone in, resulting in me literally exploding with all my emotions. It can't be healthy. So in 2014 I am going to get outside myself, make some new, trusting friendships, and build upon the relationships I already have. Part of this, I think, should include limited vague blog posts. If I can't say their name online, why am I saying it at all? And besides, now you guys will be able to follow my life a little easier. That will also reduce the amount of negative things I say about people and things. Don't worry, there will always be room for a little vague, poetic stuff, but this will be good for me.
-I'm going to serve more. I've gotten kind of selfish over the last year, what with not associating with tons of people. So yay service.
-I'm going to get ripped. haha I know everyone and their child's goldfish makes this goal each year. But my goal for last year was loving myself no matter my physical appearance. I've gotten to the point where I don't hate myself for being "fat", but I know I can improve myself and want to be the healthiest I can be. So I'm committing myself. Please feel free to ask me about my fitness goals whenever you see me, to keep me in check.
-travel (Summer 2014 HOLLER AT YOUR BOY.)
-get a consistent quadruple pirouette on flat and on pointe
-extensions above 110 degrees in all directions, both sides

What are your aspirations and goals for this year?